Recently in guidelines Category

Okay, so I missed a week or two. Shoot me. No, don't.  I have too many projects to finish. Either way:

• My brother is out of Afghanistan! He is safe and sound with his family!  I am so grateful!
• I had a wicked awful dream that could make a killer plot for NaNoWriMo if I can flesh it out more.  I always wanted to write at least one horror novel.  Just one.  One that is enough to make the skin crawl in the shadows of the night.  Just one.
• On an SCA front, we will have a new Baron and Baroness this weekend, and I'm already seeing those I determined will be total dickheads fulfill my expectations and several I thought would fall to the wayside declare they will do the best they can for the good of our Barony.  Those latter folks make me feel proud.  The others will definitely get a good scowling.
• My craft room is functional!  Super Hubby taught me to lay tile, so I spent the weekend ripping up carpet and laying said tile in a non-sexual manner, and feeling quite proud of myself.  Of course, I wish he had some advice for not wearing most of the adhesive.  I couldn't get my damn shoe off...
• My craft room is functional!  It bears repeating.  It's not finished, but oh, the paper mache and paint will splatter once again!  I'm all giddy and stuff!
• I finished an emergency embroidery project that was well-received by our baroness-elect.  Of course, I forgot to take pictures.
• Apparently, Zombie Apocolypse is the theme for this year's Halloween party.  That was the original plan, sure, but we couldn't get the venue we wanted, so I thought I'd put it off until next year when there's more time to plan...  Yeah, I had people and their children - seriously, their kids - pout at me.  The words "But, Richard has been planning this all year." came to me and I had to relent.  So, zombies.  This is not a bad thing, but the difference in venue definitely poses some interesting hurdles.  No time to teach the zombies how to do the Thriller dance, though.  Bummer.
• Next year's Halloween party theme is Freak Show.  Oh, yes, baby, I so have plans...
• It's going to be hot as hell for the event this weekend, isn't it?  *sigh*
• Oh, wait, it's supposed to rain all weekend, so the humidity will prevent me from actually being able to get out of my dresses.  Joy.
• Weight Watchers...still doing it...sort of...I keep hoping for the jello-giggly mindset to turn to concrete...
• Holy moley I want a whole lot of chips.
• Tomorrow will ben an adventure of juggling.  Eventually, we will get to site.  Whether or not we have food, we'll see.

And, this introduces your Friday.  Friday will be as plain or awful as you see it.  It's Friday.  It's always better than monday by default.  Live it up! ________________________ I am totally counting the points for these italics.  Totally.  Maybe.  Well shit.  This was easier on paper.

First, I have to give props to Super Husband for fixing the random errors on my blogs.  Now they only appear in the plugins section on Wordpress, but we figure it must be a form of demon possession, and we just haven't happened on the correct rite of excorsism to completely eradicate it.

So, NaNoWriMo is coming up in November.  You might be thinking it's a little early to start writing or even worrying about it.  Normally, I would say you were right, but I have a tweet peep who will be doing it for the first time and she questioned me about this NaNoWriMo novel she saw.

No Plot? No Problem!

Yes, it's a book on how to write for NaNoWriMo.

I'm sorry, while I give props to Chris Baty for finding a way to fund this international past time, or at least make some extra dough representing it, you don't need a freaking book to tell you how to write for NaNoWriMo.

NaNoWriMo is, for those not in the know or are too lazy to click the above links, is National Novel Writing Month.  The goal for pure bragging rights it to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days, November 1st through 30th.  Despite the criticisms from stupid professional writers who think that only their way is the only way, it's a chance to finally get that novel in your head onto the paper.  Granted, it equals out to about 175-page novel.  The one I have in mind is longer, but just think, writing 50,000 words in a month is a hell of a start.

To those writers who have said it "degrades" their "craft".  You know what, assholes?  You had to start somewhere, too.  Screw you and your egos.

Either way, again, you don't need a book to survive NaNoWriMo.

Here is my personal steps to NaNoWriMo.  You can call it a survival list, but I'm not entirely sure I survive it.  (Hey, with my obsession with zombies, it's entirely possible I'm just one myself.)

• Come up with an idea you want to put in a book: It might be something you've been knocking around for years, started several times unsucessfully, or just thought up yesterday over a serious doughnut high.  Everything starts with an idea whether it's a moment of literary genius or a chance to be stupid with dry ice and styrofoam.
• The Dreaded Outline: it helps to have some sort of outline of your plot.  I know, I know, it was the dreaded part of the writing assignment in high school, but dammit, it really can be helpful.  If you have the whole story in outline, you just have to connect the dots.  If all you have is "this guy has a love affair with his sock and hilarity ensues," then you're probably good without one.
• The Survival Stash: Okay, so, I can't have caffeine anymore, but it's the rare person who can't.  My suggestion to you over the coming weeks is to stock up on your favorite caffeinated beverages (an assortment is better) and a butt-ton, whatever that is, of your favorite food indulgence.  Usually, I suggest chocolate because it's somewhat universal, but hey, who am I to judge if you're favorite food indulgence is mashed potatoes?  Either way, this indulgence is very important.  It's the thing that keeps your family alive.  Whenever your husband/wife, kids, pets, friends, and nosy neighbors, interrupt a really good writing moment, you need something to placate your inner writing demon.  See, we all normally have creative monsters who sit on our shoulders and nudge us, but during NaNoWriMo we have writing demons.  The writing demons are mean.  They growl and bite.  Better to bite into a bar of chocolate than your neighbor's poodle.
• Actual writing: Okay, so you've signed up with your idea; you have your stash in hand; you've gently warned your family that fingers could be lost if they interrupt you; so now it's down to the writing.  50,000 words in a month might not seem like a lot to a seasoned writer or someone like Neil Gaiman who is brilliant and disturbed under his friendly exterior, but to the rest of us, it's a scary prospect.  It all begins with the first word, and it all comes down to you remembering that it is indeed a rough draft.  Anything you lay to paper right now that's not being immediately published is a rough draft.  Write it down, let it go, edit later.  Trust me.  Either way, you'll write yourself into a corner and abandon it...again.  I know you feel me on that one.
• Writer's Block:  Every writer complains about it.  It seems like a foreign object that should be tossed out with the trash, but it's an unfortunate product of your own mind.  It might be caused by the latest reality show or the fact that leaf looks really pretty outside your window.  It's a matter of your brain deciding it wants to do something else and decides that writing worth as much time as digging your underwear out of your ass.  It.  Happens.  To.  Everyone.  Seriously, if you don't experience it after the third day, you're doing well.
• The Forums, Facebook, Twitter, Your Mom: So, when I first started NaNoWriMo, really all you had was the forums to console each other and remind each other why we are all completely insane.  Now, we have other forms of social media to unleash our very victimized sentiment upon the world with little to know sympathy as a response.  But, at least we can release it, right?  Strangely, anything you put out on the forums, Twitter, Facebook, Blogs, etc. will be way more creative than anything you write in the novel you're burning braincells to write in 30 days.  It's a weird paradox.  I think the Writing Gods laugh at us.
• Have Fun: So, it's supposed to be fun.  It's supposed to be about getting your novel written or started.  It's supposed to be about enjoying some random insanity just to say you did it.  There is fun in that somewhere.  Somewhere between the lack of sleep, the fifth time you locked your husband in the closet for being a pest, the twelfth pack of chocolate bars, several hate letters to established authors, at least three acoholic stupors, and several promises to not put yourself through this again, there is fun to be had.  Let me know when you have it.
• The Hurdles: So, yeah, the choice of November, the month that officially begins the insanity of the holidays, is not a choice I would have made to have a National Novel Writing Month, bu then I think, it must be for the challenge of it.  Talk about a major distraction.  Here you are, focusing, finally, on your novel and in comes the holidays with all of its bad commercials, traditional demands, and whiney kids.  If you can make it through NaNoWriMo during that season without setting fire to your own house, I figure, you can make it through anything.  I still question the timing, but I figure that's the reason they're willing to stick with it.  At least the reasons they're willing to fess up to.
• The Aftermath: Sleep.  Blessed sleep.  Just before the holidays.  So you get all of 5 hours of sleep before you have to hit the mall and take down a granny to get the newest Elmo doll.  Enjoy your recovery.
• The Aftermath, Part 2: Finishing your novel if it isn't finished, editing your novel, doing all the sordid and horrible things you want to do to it if you want to publish it.  This isn't a necessary thing.  For some people, the NaNoWriMo is a chance to get the novel out of their head even if it only visits the harddrive and a few questionable websites.  For others, it's to realize that dream of being a published author and taking great pleasure in flipping off those pompous bastards who said it wasn't doable because you did NaNoWriMo instead of starving in the streets or finding a sponsor or whatever else they can make up to make themselves feel better.

It's not a long list and it's not necessarily hard to achieve.  It's just sort of the natural state of being in the NaNoWriMo.  Yes, doing this makes you completely nuts, but at the same time, it's fun as hell.  Even if you don't succeed to 50,000 words, you really will enjoy every word you wrote.  Guaranteed.

Write on!

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The truly fun thing about NaNoWriMo is the late night random gibberish you write just to get the word count.  "The whale watched the nugget from the convertible and told it that it was truly worth the string." makes sense in a way.  Good times!

I haven't mentioned the CSPIA in a while. This wasn't because I wasn't still fighting the good fight. It was mostly because I needed my blog to be one of the places that didn't talk about it since most the places where I spent most of my time were all about the CSPIA. Sometimes, you just need a place to recharge.

Today, on National Bankruptcy Day, I feel the need to chat about it a bit.

There has been a stay put on the CSPIA which many people have pretty much determined is just a stay for the CPSC to not have to enforce the law despite their press release.

Mostly because of the fine print which pretty much says you still have to test and that the state attorney generals can still enforce it. Granted, the press release states:

The Commission trusts that State Attorneys General will respect the Commission's judgment that it is necessary to stay certain testing and certification requirements and will focus their own enforcement efforts on other provisions of the law, e.g. the sale of recalled products.

There isn't trust that the state attorney generals won't take the fine print and run with it.

And, well, there's that whole having to test or destroy children's books printed before 1985. (Boy, that bit was definitely written by someone with the intellectual savvy of mayonnaise.)

Well, recently, the CSPIA actually released a rather easy to read set of guidlines explaining the definition of children's products, who should test, why, and what they are and aren't worried about.

You can find the PDF file on their site, but here's a direct link: CPSIA Guide

Do note their little "out" on the bottom of the title page. Either way, it does explain things.

Too bad they waited until the very last damn minute to post it. For many businesses, it's too late. And, the book thing still hasn't been resolved. (Lead in books? Are they kidding?)

Now, according to their little guide, their FAQ page, and an agent spoken to by an Etsy seller as posted by Knot By Gran'ma if your items are labeled "not intended for children under 12" then you're good. They will take your word for it. Now, granted, their FAQ has this little tidbit:

Does the CPSIA envision stuffed animals falling within the scope of the CPSIA’s lead limits or phthalate limits?

Most stuffed animals would be considered to be children’s products and presumably toys. A manufacturer would need to determine whether the design of the stuffed animals is such that it is subject to the lead paint limits, the lead content limits or the phthalate limits.

Now, that doesn't mean they automatically consider all stuffed animals toys, just most. And, that bit bout "A manufacturer would need to determine whether the design of the stuffed animals blah, blah, blah..." Well, considering their guide has this handy-dandy little table:

Table B ‐ These materials or components can be used (separately or in combination) and sold (provided they have not been treated or altered or undergone any processing that could result in the addition of lead):

•Precious gemstones: diamond, ruby, sapphire or emeralds
•Semiprecious stones provided that the mineral or material is not based on lead and is not associated with any mineral based on lead
•Natural or cultured pearls
•Wood
•Other natural materials including coral, amber, feathers, fur, and untreated leather
•Surgical steel
•Gold, of at least 10 karats
•Silver, at least 925/1000 pure
•Platinum, palladium, rhodium, osmium, iridium, and ruthenium
•Yarn, dyed or undyed
•Dyed or undyed textiles (cotton, wool, hemp, nylon, etc.), including children’s fabric products, such as baby blankets, and non‐metallic thread and trim. This does not include products that have rhinestones or other ornaments that may contain lead or that have fasteners with possible lead content (such as buttons, metal snaps, zippers or grommets).
•Children’s books printed after 1985 that are conventionally printed and intended to be read, as opposed to used for play
•Certain educational materials, such as chemistry sets

So, if you use any of these items, you're still golden, as long as you're careful about buttons and such.

What it comes down to is they are finally getting the hint and figuring out that, yes, this rule has to have exceptions. I expect there will be tons of revisions of this guide and that there will be much arguing about this law.

Now, the reason I'm posting this is to shine a light down the tunnel and to also make sure that there is no question about my items. First of all, I have emailed all the manufacturers of the yarns, filler, etc. I use to make my crocheted creatures, and they have all certified lead-free. On top of that, the CPSC itself says that textiles are not counted.

Granted, even if they hadn't said that, I wasn't going to stop making my creatures. Nothing I use has lead in it, and everything is as safe as I can make it. Hell, as proof, when I'm sewing dragon bits together, I often have to wet the end of the yarn to get it through the eye of the tapestry needle, and how do most people moisten the end of thread or yarn before poking it through a needle? They stick it in their mouth! As much as I have to do that, I ought to be suffering pretty heavily from lead poisoning if there were lead in the yarn. But, THERE IS NO LEAD IN YARN. And, I'll be damned if they're going to tell me I can't make my creatures because they had a knee jerk reaction to the horrors imported from China. Products manufactured in this country are already bound by laws to keep lead and other dangers out of a child's toy box. The CSPIA is not only redundant but aimed at the wrong people. Oh, sure, I'm all for product safety, especially for kids, but um, let's try to aim the laws at the source of the problems, namely Asian manufacturers. My creatures have no loose parts. They do not contain lead.

Now, they are toys. I'll freely admit that. Although, funnily enough, I've not sold a single dragon for a child. Every one that I've sold has gone to an adult who had no intention of sharing with any kid. (Does that make them adult toys?) But, I can't deny, especially after seeing how many people want to give them to their kids if they win one for the OWOH, that they are toys. Did I ever intend them for kids under 12? Honestly? No. I intended them for fantasy convention geeks and SCA folks and really did just have adults in mind. Probably because I'm mostly an adult kid myself. But, I absolutely believed that some people will want them for their kids. Now, I could easily turn them into art dolls and say they aren't for children, but I can't control it if a parent decides to give it to their child. Besides, as previously stated, it doesn't matter anyway, yarn is not included in the lead testing and all of my stuff was already tested by the manufacturer anyway. They are about as safe as any other stuffed creature made with love, care, and the intention to give adults a chance to be kids and kids to have something that isn't cold, mass-produced, and void of any personality at all.

So, I leave it up to the populace to decide. I will make my Wee Dragons and my Balls of Bun and probably whatever else comes to mind. If parents aren't satisfied that they aren't going to abjectly murder children, they don't have to buy them. As stated, I mainly had adults in mind anyway. But, according to the CSPIA and several senators' aides and that guide book, I don't have to stop making them.

Besides, it's absolutely against my very fiber to let them bully me. My paternal grandmother taught me to crochet when I was six. She would be very proud to see how I've progressed from potholders, and I doubt very seriously she would let me stop just because some government yahoo who knows nothing about handmade products wrote some sweeping legislation just to give himself a pat on the back. She was Cajun. Cajuns don't take too kindly to being bullied.

For Grandma!



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And, hey, if they want to push the issue and decide that, yes, everything must be tested and, yes, we are all potential baby killers, then fine, let them. When the same people who support it can't find the handmade stuff they want to buy in order to avoid Chinese imports, when they go looking for some collectible doll from their childhood only to be told it is in a landfill, when all the books they grew up with are gone, when they realize it's not a Good Thing to let the government raise their kids, we'll see how fast the law changes. And, still I will make Wee Dragons. Because Wee Dragons don't take kindly to being bullied either.

Besides, being a Crafting Outlaw has an appeal to it...